Purpose Matures: From Finding Yourself to Inspiring Others

A few weeks ago, I was co-facilitating a Mentoring workshop at the 2026 Ascend Engage Conference. The conference theme was "Forward with Purpose." Thus, the idea of purpose became a main staple of conversations. In my closing comments, I challenged the room of aspiring and functioning leaders to test their purpose statement with others to see if it inspires followership. 

"What's your purpose?"

It's one of the most common questions in leadership development. It's also one of the hardest to answer. Many of us treat purpose as if it is something we discover once, write down in a journal, and carry with us for the rest of our lives. I don't think that's how purpose works.

I believe purpose evolves. As we grow through different stages of life and leadership, our understanding of purpose matures. It expands beyond ourselves, and eventually, if we are intentional, it becomes so deeply embedded that we stop trying to do things based on our purpose—we simply live it.

Stage One: Borrowed Purpose

Our first purpose is usually one someone else gives us. Parents encourage us to study hard. Teachers push us to succeed. Communities define what a "good life" looks like. Our cultures, faith traditions, and role models shape our earliest ambitions.

For many of us, purpose begins with meeting expectations rather than discovering our own. There is nothing wrong with this. Every one of us starts somewhere, and borrowed purpose often gives us the foundation to build a meaningful life.

Eventually, however, we begin asking a different question. Not, "What do others expect of me?" But, "Who do I want to become?"

Stage Two: Personal Purpose

This is where purpose becomes intentional. A personal purpose provides direction during uncertainty. It helps us make decisions, persevere through setbacks, and focus on what matters most.

It answers questions such as:

• What kind of person do I want to become?

• What values will guide my decisions?

• What gives my life meaning?

Personal purpose is deeply important because it shapes our character. But there is an important realization that often comes with leadership. A purpose that inspires you is not necessarily a purpose that inspires others.

The Difference Between Personal Purpose and Leadership Purpose

Many people talk about leadership purpose as if it is simply a larger version of personal purpose. I think it is something different.

A personal purpose answers: Why do I get up every morning?

A leadership purpose answers: What future am I inviting others to help create?

That subtle shift changes everything. Leadership is not simply about accomplishing your own goals. It is about creating a future that other people want to help build. A leadership purpose should be understandable to others. More importantly, it should be meaningful enough that others choose to contribute to it. That is where followership begins.

The Followership Test

Here's a simple question every leader can ask. If I shared my purpose with my team today, would they simply understand it—or would they want to help make it happen?

If the answer is, "That's nice for you," you probably have a strong personal purpose. If the answer is, "I'd like to be part of that," you're describing a leadership purpose. Consider the difference.

"I want to become the best leader I can be." There's nothing wrong with that statement. It is admirable. Now compare it with: "I build pathways for others to succeed." The first describes personal growth. The second makes a promise. It tells people what they can expect to experience because of your leadership. Leadership purpose creates shared meaning.

Stage Three: Practiced Purpose

Even after we define our purpose, we don't automatically live it. Purpose requires practice. It requires reminders, reflection, course corrections, and renewals.

There will be times when our calendars no longer reflect our priorities, when stress replaces intention, and when success tempts us to drift from the values that brought us there. Practice and consistency build resiliency.

Purpose isn't strengthened by writing it down once. It is strengthened by choosing it repeatedly.

Stage Four: Embodied Purpose

Eventually something remarkable happens. Purpose stops feeling like a statement you need to remember. It becomes part of your character. You no longer ask yourself whether you're being driven by your purpose before every conversation or every decision. You are simply being your purpose.

Others begin describing you in ways that sound remarkably similar to the purpose you once wrote down. Not because you keep talking about it. Because they experience it. The highest form of purpose may not be the one you can recite. It may be the one other people can consistently feel.

Most importantly, by being your purpose, you naturally show up when others opt out, move when others stand still, get back up when others stay down, and have the courage to wayfind through the unknown.

Purpose Is Meant to Grow

Perhaps purpose isn't something we discover. Perhaps it is something we continually grow into. It begins as something we inherit. Then it becomes something we choose. As leaders, it expands beyond ourselves and becomes an invitation for others. Finally, through years of intentional practice, it becomes inseparable from who we are.

The people we lead may never remember our purpose statement. But they will remember how we made them feel, what they learned because of us, the opportunities we created, and the confidence we helped them discover.

In the end, perhaps that is the greatest measure of purpose. Not that we accomplished our goals. But that our purpose became someone else's opportunity.

Reflection Questions

• Who first shaped your sense of purpose?

• Has your purpose changed over the different stages of your life?

• Is your current purpose primarily about your own growth, or does it invite others into a shared future?

• If you shared your purpose with your team tomorrow, would they simply understand it—or would they want to help make it happen?

• What daily habits are helping your purpose move from intention to identity?

• If others described your leadership today, what purpose would they say you are already living?